The course of life isn't one that you can just wake up late to, or not turn up. I didn't willingly enroll nor did I have to sit an entry exam to qualify for this position. Or did I? Thats a tangent for another book.

But here I am, a week shy of 23 and on a flight to Beijing with someone who honestly, never even crossed my mind before the universe had our paths cross.

It seems like everyday I learn something new about life, about love, about myself.

It's the first time I've been so close but so detached from my heart. And even I'm surprised because he's a nice guy. Perhaps I've learned not to chase love and let love chase me? Every other time I've tried, crossed seas, moved to a different country - basically going all out - it's ended sooner or later. Is this not me? I always thought it was. The people who are close to me would tell you they no of no other, but time and space has changed my essence. And I'm now a new person.

Learning to enjoy the here and now instead of dreaming up a future fairytale tastes a little bitter once you've swallowed it but without doubt it saves you from enduring one rocky emotional roller coaster. Closing off a section of the ride doesn't mean you don't get the entire experience, it just means you have to ride along a few more times to get a V.I.P pass.

Have I become a true cynic to the ways of man-kind? Or is this just the path i'm meant to travel…alone?

Because love songs no longer hold depth, they no longer tug at my heart or paint a picture of anyone. They are empty and just sound like sad songs of a love I no longer know.